Thursday, 7 July 2011

QOTW: If you were selling your muse, how would you describe her/him/it?

Sometimes I ask myself the most bizarre questions. After reading about Army of Dave's attempts to sell the Universe on eBay last week (do read his blog post, I still have a smile on my face every time I think about it), I started wondering how I'd describe my muse, if I ever tried to sell her.

Of course I wouldn't! What do you take me for? But if I did . . .here's what the advert would probably say:

Second-hand speculative fiction muse.

Has given immense satisfaction during usage, and provided all my best ideas. Both ink and computer trained. Will require a weekly trip to a book store and Costa Coffee, and a few days holiday a year. Will disappear from time to time, but always returns with new ideas.

£1,000,000 or nearest offer.

If you were selling your muse, how would you describe her/him/it?

Disclaimer: Ellie would like to apologise unreservedly to her muse and any other muses who may have been offended by this blog post. She would never attempt to sell her muse. She worships the ground her muse walks on, and understands that without muses all writers would not . . .well, write.


  1. LOL! I like the Costa Coffee bit. Excellent idea.

    This 'almost' careful owner is reluctantly selling her muse after a long and varied alliance. Muse likes stimulating country walks, bright crisp sunny days, regular Costa Coffees and will attempt any genre within reason, but is afraid of zombies! £1,000,000,000 offers (might then be)considered. :O)

  2. lol

    lazy muse for sale. Going cheap. Will inspire at the worst possible times.

  3. I've never been able to think of my inspiration in a personified way. Too little imagination? Just doesn't make sense in my mind.

  4. I haven't got the imagination at the memonet, might think of something later, early in the morning to get brain fuctioning,


  5. Ellie!!

    Mine's the opposite! My muse will be trying to sell me! For free!!! LOL! take care

  6. Hmmm! I think you've under-priced it. After all, just think, if JK had sold her muse for a mere million she'd have made someone else very wealthy.

    I think I'd try to put people off buying it - something like this...

    Muse for sale. Does its best and shows up occasionally when needed. Shipping will be as soon as I find it on completion of the sale. Serious offers only.

  7. Having looked up Muse, I find that it can be an ancient Greek goddess, or a rock band. I expect the rock band would fetch the most on eBay, but I suspect you are not thinking along those lines, so you must be trying to sell a Goddess. Not a very safe practice, you can end up suffering a horrible fate if you continue along this course of action. Greek Goddesses are renown for tricky dealing and you may end up turned into a swan or something worse. So I beg you to reconsider before it is too late.

  8. Works well under pressures. Fueled by Hot Tamales.

  9. My muse would be a tough sell. "Overactive imagination, providing more ideas than time to write, and prone to unmarketable storylines. Also prone to optimism and romance."

  10. my muse says, "pishaw! take the challenge and describe me! i dare you to come close to choosing ample adjectives and praises worthy of my immense power."
    he's so humble, but he does give me great ideas.
    "great? that's the best you can do? i may have to quit!"
    he won't. he's chained up in the back closet of my brain =)

  11. Hi Ellie .. the selling of the universe is too funny .. made me laugh too ..

    Muse - what muse ... and your question - brilliant in conjunction with our world post ..

    Have a great weekend... cheers Hilary

  12. Hi Ellie .. whoo-hoo .. pop-up comment box = bliss .. so much easier .. thank you! cheers Hilary

  13. My ad would be

    "Troublesome muse for sale. Can be a constant pain in the head.Does the disappearing act frequently. Price negotiable."

    Btw...can I bid for your muse?

  14. Creative idea...

    How about: "For sale: One Write1Sub1 mug filled to the brim with vanilla chai tea!"

  15. Requires oreo's and lots of caffiene. Oh and a back massage from time to time.

  16. I love it! I am not sure how to phrase mine on the spur of the moment, but it would include something to do with chocolate and lots of gasoline to fill up the vehicle's tank (my best ideas arrive on the road).

  17. Used Muse. Doesn't take bribes. Is immune to pleas for help. Takes frequent sick days. Sometimes answers to fervent prayer. Cheap.

  18. Ha ha, you are not going to get me to fall for this one!

  19. My muse is new to me, I couldn't possibly dream of selling her. Love your advert though!


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